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Nov 3, 2010 - Update! R.I.P. Prop 19. We barely knew you.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Happy Weed Wednesday! New Blog, Weed Etiquette, and More!

        Hello everybody! I'm truly sorry for the delay in posting.  I had to take care of a few personal matters.  The good news is, during my time away, I planned out many exciting ideas for a series of new blogs that I will be creating over the next few days/weeks.

        Before I get back to weed business, I'd like to announce that the first of these blogs is ready for unveiling!

        As you can probably tell, the content will not be related to marijuana culture, but rather 80's and 90's popular culture, etc.  Nonetheless, I hope that you will find it enjoyable!


        With that taken care of, let's move on to some fun stuff.  I'm going to try to make up for my lack of posting in the past few days by having a longer than usual post today.

        I've realized that there may be some novice smokers in the building, so here's a short guide to Smoking Etiquette, from the book Everything About Pot That We Could Remember, which I highly recommend.

        We Marijuana-loggers feel that marijuana smokers havea bad reputation. They're usually thought of as lazy and dim-witted. Why, this couldn't be further from the tooth. There is actually a strict code of discipline that pot smokers must firmly adhere to. Here are the highlights from an actual webpage from an authority known as "Scooter 512" (or something like that - it could have been "Scooter 513" or "Bandit 300"- lets not get hung up on details, okay?)

Rule Number One: If someone rolls a nice joint, it's good to give the person a compliment on their rolling skills. Something like, "Thats some tight shit, buddy!"
Rule Number 2: Always remember to thank the person who has gotten you high. Unless it was really killer weed, in which case it is perfectly acceptable to forget to say thank you
Rule Number C: Never make your smoke out to be better than it really is. This gets everybody's hopes up just to be let down. Don't go bragging about how you got the Chronic, and then whip out the Down Town Brown on everyone's ass! People hate that. Especially us.
Rule Number 14: It is very impolite to hand someone an empty bowl without notifying that person of its potential emptyosity. A proper warning would be, Here ya go... I think it might be cashed. Go ahead give it a try, see what happens. We're all pulling for you. Good Luck."
Rule Number Seven: When rolling a joint, don't ever pack a seed. Instead, pack a lunch. It will come in very handy later. Make sure you pack enough to share.
Rule Number 8: You have to allot at least seven and three-quarters minutes of fake interest in the person supplying the weed. Say something nice about them or stuff, like, "Cool pipe," or, "Wow, that's a neat lizard."
Rule Number 9: I'm glad your cousin works in a movie theater and let you sit in the projection room once when you were visiting him in Phoenix last summer... but what you should really do is take a hit and pass the pipe already.
Rule Number 10: If you're getting high with someone and they ask for a sip of your drink, you must give them some. Dry mouth is not fucking funny. In fact, if left untreated, it can lead to the dreaded cottonmouth. Which without immediate hydration, can turn into full blown Old Man's Ass Mouth.
Rule Number Next One: It is not cool to criticize people's weed in front of them. Example, "Hey, no thanks. I'd rather smoke horse puke than your low quality shit weed. Thanks for offering though." Don't do that. it hurts.
Rule Number Yellow: Hey don't push anyone to smoke pot with you. It's cool to offer weed to your new neighbor, but if they refuse, back off. In other words don't do this. "Hey, Mr. Johnson, this is your new neighbor. You're about to smoke pot whether you want it or not. So get over here and suck on my bong!" Don't do that. It's pushers that make marijuana illegal. And politics. And Laws. Mostly laws.
Rule Number Unicorn: Pass the j clockwise, always clockwise. (That means the direction a clock goes.)  (Blogger's note: Remember, as Beyonce says, TO THE LEFT, TO THE LEFT).
Rule Number %: Never Bogart. But if you supply the weed you can Baccall us anytime. (If you didn't get that, ask an old person to explain it to you.)
A Rule That Rhymes: When smoking a bowl with other smokers, remember this saying: Don't be mean, leave some green.
A Rule About Roaches: Don't eat them. It doesn't get you high it just makes you look like a hobo.
A Rule That Is So Obvious It Shouldn't Even Be A Rule But Here It Is: Don't get your spit all over the pipe, bong, or joint. Remember, your bodily fluids are disgusting, so please don't force them upon others.
Rule Number 8,763: Dude, don't be a dick and spill the bong water. It smells like Cheech's Ass.
Rule Number 1.2 Million: Please do not, while getting stoned in a canoe, stand up. You may drown. Or Worse, spill the bong water into the lake.
Rule Number Chimp: The person who rolls the joing (no matter whose weed it is) gets to spark up the joint and gets first hits.
Rule Number Cider-House: If you're getting high in your house with someone, offer them some snacks if you have any. If you don't, that's cool. It's not cool that you don't have food, but its cool if you don't offer. Cause you don't have any.
Rule Number Finally: And perhaps the most important rule of them all - according to "Scooter 512" - if three guys write a somewhat padded out sincere book entirely about marijuana, maybe you should get them high if ever your paths should cross in a comedy club or a dirty back alley.

        And now, I'd like to start a tradition that hopefully I'll carry on throughout the life of this blog.  Every Wednesday (or maybe more often), I'll be recommending various things to keep you entertained during your high. ;D

Movie Recommendation: Trainspotting

        Many of you were disappointed that I didn't put Trainspotting on my list of top 5 stoner movies of all time.  As mentioned, I have a predisposition for comedies, but even I had to admit, Trainspotting is a damned good movie.  The movie follows a group of heroin addicts in early 1990's economically-depressed Edinburgh and their passage through life.  We watch as the central character, Mark Renton goes from questioning the banalities of modern-day suburbia to accepting his fate and attempting to give up his heroin habit.  The film won an Oscar and was voted as one of the top 10 British films of all time.  It has now become a cult classic, verifying the the common person's fascination with drug and specifically, the dark and mysterious lives of heroin addicts.  If you still need more reason to see this movie...well, just watch the damn trailer!

Click here to download (torrent) movie.  (Use VLC Media Player to play).

Music Recommendation: Trainspotting Soundtrack

        Yup, a little uncreative I know, but trust me, the soundtrack to this movie is fucking great.  Filled with everything from legends like Lou Reed, Iggy Pop, and Brian Eno to modern day music geniuses like Daman Albarn.  I've selected one of my favorite tracks of all times: Underworld by Born Slippy (doubles as both a chill song and something to dance to).  If you're interested in listening to the entire soundtrack, I've provided a download link.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Thanks for 100+ Followers! Here's a Gift for my Friends

Woot! I was going to make this post when I had 100 followers but I've reached an amazing 130 with a little help from my friends.  Thanks for all the support guys!  Here's a little present to thank all you lovely people. :)  Hope you enjoy!

On a side note, I would like to point out that from now on (well technically, starting yesterday), I will do my best to respond to your comments.  This will probably be in the form of my own comment replying to yours (like in the previous post), so be sure to check back and keep in touch.

Thanks again everyone!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Top 5 Stoner Movies of All Time

Today I have for you the 5 best movies to watch while stoned.  This list wasn't made by some fancy establishment (down with The Man!). I made it myself.  I tried to keep the list to mostly contemporary films from my lifetime that I've seen and can relate to.  I apologize ahead of time because I'm not really a great movie reviewer but I did my best to add a little synopsis for each movie.  Let me know what you guys think, and if you agree or disagree.  Also, what's your favorite movie to watch stoned?

5.  Friday - Remember when Ice Cube was a gangsta rapper? Me neither, but this is a great movie about two stoners in south central LA.  I'm too high to remember exactly what the fuck this movie's about.  Something about getting some money to pay some gangsters before Friday is over and the bad guys kill the main characters (while smoking in between of course).  Chris Tuckers portrayal of the ridiculous Smokey provides a good balance to Ice Cube's overly serious (whilst high? lol) Craig.  Overall, this is a classic film and a definite must see for anyone who loves blunts, bitches, and 40s.

4. Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle - A film about the ultimate munchie mission.  I'm sure we can all relate to the epic adventure that happens on this search for the perfect food to satisfy those cravings.  And did I mention they ride a cheetah, marry a bag of weed, and bump into the human form of all things badass - Neil Patrick Harris? This movie is great stoned or sober because of its sheer absurdity.  Watch it!

3. Half Baked - The film that introduced the world to the comic genius that is Dave fucking Chapelle.  To be fair, all the actors in the film did a great job.  The portrayal of stoners is so realistic that I'm pretty sure they were all stoned off their asses when the film was shot.  Still, I can't help but admire Dave Chappelle's sharp wit and subtle intellectual references throughout the film.  You're not a true stoner until you've seen this film.
Scientist: Janitor? Uh, janitor?
[taps Thurgood, who gets frightened]
Thurgood: Ah! Oh..sorry 'bout that. What is it, scientist?
Scientist: I know this isn't your responsibility but, uh, could you be a dear and run this down to the supply department for me? It's on the second floor. [hands Thurgood a note]
Thurgood: Just run this down?
Scientist: Yes, but make sure you bring the order right back to me. I need it A.S.A.P.
Thurgood: Gotcha. Hey, I know this isn't your responsibility but just wipe the rest of this shit up [hands him a mop] I'll be right back.

2. The Big Lebowski - The movie is basically about a broke stoner who gets mistaken for a millionaire with the same name as him.  Hilarity ensues.  Not gonna lie though; I watched this movie like 7 times before I knew what the fuck was going on.  But that didn't stop the movie from being goddamned hilarious every time.  It's full of ridiculous dialogue, a hilarious plot, and the most absurd yet genius characters I have ever seen ("Nobody fucks with The Jesus") . 

1. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas - This has got to be one of my favorite movies of all time.  Based on the novel by Hunter S. Thompson (which is, depending on who you believe, based on a true story), this movie has it all: drugs, adventure, politics, and nostalgia for the 60s and 70s.  The specific plot is irrelevant, its the journey that counts in this film.  It is epic on so many different levels, but what's great about it is that it can be as deep as you want it to be.  You can read between the lines and meditate about past times and what freedom really means in America or you can just sit back, relax, get high, and enjoy the amazing visual scenes created by Terry Giliam.  And I shouldn't forget to mention the legendary performance given by Johnny Depp, who followed Hunter S. Thompson around for months before starting the film, so as to exactly replicate his image and personality.  Be prepared for quite an experience when watching this movie. 


(Sorry about the quality of the clip, it was the best I could find that captured the general mood of the film)

Edit: I just want to mention that there are a lot of great movies out there but I am obviously bias towards comedies ^^

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Carl Sagan: Renowned Astronomer, Astrophysicist, Author, and... Avid Pot Smoker

We all know Carl Sagan was one of the most brilliant minds of the 20th century.  What is lesser known is that he was quite the stoner, and an advocate for the legalization of marijuana.  What follows is an excerpt from an essay he wrote (under a pseudonym) about marijuana.


Mr. X by Carl Sagan

        It all began about ten years ago. I had reached a considerably more relaxed period in my life – a time when I had come to feel that there was more to living than science, a time of awakening of my social consciousness and amiability, a time when I was open to new experiences. I had become friendly with a group of people who occasionally smoked cannabis, irregularly, but with evident pleasure. Initially I was unwilling to partake, but the apparent euphoria that cannabis produced and the fact that there was no physiological addiction to the plant eventually persuaded me to try. My initial experiences were entirely disappointing; there was no effect at all, and I began to entertain a variety of hypotheses about cannabis being a placebo which worked by expectation and hyperventilation rather than by chemistry. After about five or six unsuccessful attempts, however, it happened. I was lying on my back in a friend’s living room idly examining the pattern of shadows on the ceiling cast by a potted plant (not cannabis!). I suddenly realized that I was examining an intricately detailed miniature Volkswagen, distinctly outlined by the shadows. I was very skeptical at this perception, and tried to find inconsistencies between Volkswagens and what I viewed on the ceiling. But it was all there, down to hubcaps, license plate, chrome, and even the small handle used for opening the trunk. When I closed my eyes, I was stunned to find that there was a movie going on the inside of my eyelids. Flash . . . a simple country scene with red farmhouse, a blue sky, white clouds, yellow path meandering over green hills to the horizon. . . Flash . . . same scene, orange house, brown sky, red clouds, yellow path, violet fields . . . Flash . . . Flash . . . Flash. The flashes came about once a heartbeat. Each flash brought the same simple scene into view, but each time with a different set of colors . . . exquisitely deep hues, and astonishingly harmonious in their juxtaposition. Since then I have smoked occasionally and enjoyed it thoroughly. It amplifies torpid sensibilities and produces what to me are even more interesting effects, as I will explain shortly....

        ...There is a very nice self-titering aspect to cannabis. Each puff is a very small dose; the time lag between inhaling a puff and sensing its effect is small; and there is no desire for more after the high is there. I think the ratio, R, of the time to sense the dose taken to the time required to take an excessive dose is an important quantity. R is very large for LSD (which I’ve never taken) and reasonably short for cannabis. Small values of R should be one measure of the safety of psychedelic drugs. When cannabis is legalized, I hope to see this ratio as one of he parameters printed on the pack. I hope that time isn’t too distant; the illegality of cannabis is outrageous, an impediment to full utilization of a drug which helps produce the serenity and insight, sensitivity and fellowship so desperately needed in this increasingly mad and dangerous world.

Read the full essay at: http://marijuana-uses.com/mr-x/

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Apple Pipe

Going to switch things up a little bit today. Instead of comedy, I bring you some knowledge that may come in handy in desperate times, or just if you're feeling silly.  =P

Kat Williams - Weed

There is a chemical in weed called "fuck it"

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Best Stoned Comedian Ever?

best stoned comedian ever?


So what's up with the name?  

I don't know how many times I've been home alone (thus the name), and blazed out of my mind with nothing to do.  Of course browsing the internet is a great idea but there's so much shit on the web that I can't really decide on anything and I sorta just sit there zoning out.  This blog was created as an easy go-to for all your internet tripping needs.

I'll try to keep this updated at least once a week, ideally every other day, possibly even every day, depending on how much time I have.  

Here you should find anything and everything to satisfy your stoned mind.  

Want to just sit back and relax?  I'll post some funny pictures and video clips.

If you're in the mood to groove, there will be links to hypnotizing tunes and music to trip out to.

Or if you're an intellectual stoner, I'll provide interesting, thought-provoking articles and recent news so your mind has something to chew on.

The goal is to keep your high going and your mind satisfied, so stay tuned and let's see what happens!